such a beautiful expression of raw emotion, abliet positive emotions. though i may never want to write songs like these (haha), someday i want my songs to be able to express all my feelings at that particular instant. such a hard skill to learn.

its all right (:

wow, so true

Zouk was a fucking failure omg, I'm never going clubbing with more than one group of friends again, shuffling between them is so fucked up and eventually everyone goes missing haha.

oh and did i mention that i dont remember jagerbombs tasting as good as they were at zouk yesterday! seriously. the drinks yesterday were FUCKING GOOD. even my free vodka lime hahaha i didnt even ask for it to be stronger but i swear it was 2 parts vodka one part lime juice. omgawd i hope saturday is good with chester then i can steal his drinks:S and i have an interview with smu business on saturday so i cant go with julia to zouk on friday!:(

I love my friends:) the ones who matter. I am going to miss them so much in army. I guess everything takes some getting used too! But don't worry, I'm trying. I guess thqt being a 'real' friend doesn't mean you have to be there all the time, or that that person has to live life the same way as you and have the same values as you. It just means that in spite of certain flaws, you still care genuinely for them and want the best for them! I guess it really is all about 'how much you can live with'. I've realised the hardest part for many people, myself included, is living with the reality which often falls short of expectations. Cause friendships are not a one sided affair at all, so if you find someone who gives back as much as he/she takes, then good for you!

Omg I think too much for a guy. Hahaha.

For the record,

I AM NOT DEPRESSED!!!!:):):):) see those haha I am perfectly fine:) it's okay to think and get frustrated sometimes, so yes I am fine! ( and kinda darker now after the extremly fun tanning yesterday:D)

Phuture was okay!:) apple shooters are DAMN NICE omg I know I feel like a girl for liking such a wussy drink haha. Ok, off to bishan now:s

OMFG FUCK I CANT FUCKING SLEEP ITS 7 AM NICE I SHALL NOT SLEEP TONIGHT AND GO THROUGH SUNDAY AS IF NTH HAPPENED, THEN IN ABOUT 12 HOURS OR SO ILL KNOCKOUT AND WAKE UP AND IT SHALL BE MONDAY HURRAH.

OMFG JUST UPLOAD YOU STUPID FUCKING TESTIMONIAL FUCK IM GOING TO PLAY GUITAR FUCK IT!

today was supposed to be the "HATS AND FLOWERS" picnic with kim and yvette!! i feel like a bloody girl. but damn i woke up late, its raining and apparently its raining at marina too. sigh.

for like the past 2 weeks, ive been waking up at 2-4 pm everyday. it really doesnt help that no one's at home haha cause then theres no one to wake me up! even though yvette called today, i still couldnt wake up sigh.

and all the applicatioins are killing me. NVM, after this week, there will only be uni scholarships left!

back when music wasnt about how good you look, or how big your boobs/biceps/pocket-to-pay-for-auto-tuning-in-the-studio was....

it was all about this




i especially like the last few lines!

I see you standing
Standing on your own
It's such a lonely place for you
For you to be

If you need a shoulder
Or if you need a friend
I'll be here standing
Until the bitter end

No one needs the sorrow
No one needs the pain
I hate to see you
Walking out there
Out in the rain


So don't chastise me
Or think I, I mean you harm
Of those that take you
Leave you strung out
Much too far
Baby-yeah

Don't ever leave me
Say you'll "always" be there
All I ever wanted
Was for you
To know that I care

So today I finished my mas Scholarship application! With some professional help from my mum, lotsa frustration which was fueled on by the lack of cigarettes, I'm quite proud of what I sent in:) left with kpmg,sgx and the uni scholarships! I hope that I get an interview for at least one of them:( also completed my applications to the 3 unis today! I'm quite scared if I don't get into accountancy in ntu cause my first choice for nus and smu is business, which may be too general and not viable:( mum says it's not all about that at work although it does play a part.

I read the forum section of the straits times for the first time yesterday! I liked it:) hope I read it regularly from now on!

Yay, times are looking up:) goodluck Jonathan for your upcoming march block tests!

Funny, 7 am and I'm still up..

Damn that felt good. Time to DOTA!

i've moved on, heard that you have too.

wait what am i saying, you obviously have. sigh. b-itch. life's a bed of shit if you wanna look at it that way. oh well, ive moved on to MUCH greener pastures and people who wont actually abandon me at the most unexpected times.

no one is at home today. mum's working and maid's at grandma's house. damn no food no one to talk to i feel so alone.

Quick post here.

Thank god for my results. I'm very happy for Binghao too:) he just enlisted on Saturday and I hope he will be fine!

This marks the end of my childhood! Like officially. Kinda scary but I can't wait to move on and face new challenges ( p.s I know I sound like a nerd)

On a lighter ( and more bimbo-ly note) I haven't exercised for three days! Too much dancing and I just ate a lor Mai Kai and two paos heh. I better run tomorrow!

Results later. I hope that whatever it is, that I would be accepting. Because even though the world sees that tiny result slip as everything that one can accomplish in jc, I know that the past 2 years have been the best years of my life:) so even tho it would be hard, especially If I don't do well, I will try not to think like that.

2010 hasn't been good tho, so I hope I do well, otherwise this year would REALLY have gotten off to the wrong foot considering that it's al mrarch and the first quarter of 2010 is about to end.

You're the best I know

why cant you live with peoples opinions? especially after what you did, you expect me to just keep quiet? sooner or later people are going to find out what happened and if they all form the same opinion or whatever, i think it says something.. dont you get it? you cant stop it. be stronger and live with it.

I better sleep tonight omg.

After results on Friday, we really have finished the 'kids' phase of our lives. It is scary, and intimidating to suddenly realise that you're not going to be able to be stupid and get away with it, or you can wake up with absolutely nothing or everything to do because of the lack of a fixed schedule to tell us what to do. Of course for guys it's different but still..

All this added to the stress about actually receiving the results on Friday is killing me! I spent the last few days looking at courses and local scholarships.. Sigh nothing still really appeals to me but if I do well I may apply and become just like everyone else. Or I may not! And keep my options open! I think I enjoy this newfound freedom, cause I have always been a blind ass believer of the system, doing most of what they tell me to do academically.

Sigh, it's been keeping me up recently, nights where I'm not out I've been sleeping EARLIEST at 4am:( I woke up at 4 today, sigh this is not healthy. And I have to go to church omg.

Oh and of course there's you. I almost forgot. Can't you see, that this whole thing is helping and not an easy way out for me. You're not making it easier by not replying. Zzz wtf man.


side track, goodluck to your new job Yvette! "Cher' cher'!"